how to be a force to be reckoned with on the pole


Perhaps you've had a dark and depressing five days, five weeks or even five years. Everything seems to be going wrong at work, at home, even in your pole classes.

Maybe your boss is a jerk, you can’t seem to lose those last ten pounds and you literally can’t invert consistently to save your damned soul. Life can suck sometimes. Been there, man.

You may start to believe that you will never get what you want. 

Life doesn't seem fair sometimes, does it? We all know the old adage, "Life ain't fair" and sure, I tend to agree, but we all want to find some kind of peace and a little part of joy in our lives.

Sometimes we just want things to go our way just a little bit – even if that means showing up to class and being able to do a trick and subsequently feeling that sense of accomplishment that we yearn for. Why does it seem like when it rains it pours – when some things in life aren’t going our way, nothing else seems to fall into place either?

Many of us give our power away to other people thinking that they are the ones that will bring us this elusive peace. We wait for them to help us, to comfort us, to show us that there is that happiness we've been looking for. But you know what? We all have inside of us everything we already need. That is powerful.

Dark days show us what we really are on the inside and what we have the potential to be.

Dark days show us what we really are on the inside and what we have the potential to be.

And guess what? These struggles we experience actually make us into the very people we want to be.

Ever had a vision of yourself as a super-confident badass, able to handle anything that comes their way? Ever dreamed of yourself as being an unstoppable force on the pole that people can’t take their eyes off of?

Our struggles are what form us into these strong and beautiful people we aspire to be.

When we’re riding the super-sucky Struggle Bus Dumpster Fire Express, that’s like our breeding ground of badassery. Our gunslinger seeds are planted here in this seeming wasteland. Just wait. Everything may be shit right now but the grass is always greener where the dogs are shitting.

The road to living The Boss Life ain’t always pretty.

In fact, it’s paved with tears, unknowns, frustration and feelings of doubt. What do you do with that shit though? Do you give in and fold? Or do you recommit and double your efforts?

You say you wanna be a rockstar and live a meaningful life, but are you willing to play with life and all it’s wonderful and weird twists?

Guess what, friend?

There are some games you don’t get to play unless you’re all in.

If you want to live a life of meaning, you must first decide this is what you want. Living a life of meaning is not a thing that happens to you naturally. Our first instinct is often to run in the other direction as soon as difficulty arises.

The most surefire and quickest way to trasnform yourself into a force to be reckoned with is to decide right here, right now that you will use all your struggles to your benefit. This decision will set the tone for how you will deal with all subsequent circumstances.

This decision separates the girls from the women, the boys from the men.

What’s the upside to facing all this inconvenient struggle?

You get to live at the top of your game.

You get to know what you’re really made of. You get to look at your face in the mirror and see not the face of a naive hobbledehoy but instead the face of a person formed by their responsibility and resolve.

This is the truly empowered way to view oneself and one's life. This is True Power. Fuck what ya heard about being a “bad bitch” - this is what confidence truly is.

If you cultivate the ability to self-generate love, appreciation, comfort, and joy in the face of struggle, you are untouchable. This is true empowerment.

Side note: I’m often asked by students how they can be more sexy. This is what makes a person truly sexy. Everything else is ornamental, but that “attitude” all comes from this decision to live life and all of its unknowns all in.